Dear Family,
I would like to start off with a thought I have been
pondering on for the last few weeks, I'm not sure how it applies back
home, but I feel like I should share it, and I'm learning to follow
these kinds of feelings.
I was given a commitment in district meeting to think about how
virtue could help my area, help me be a better missionary and how virtue
ties into faith. As I have pondered and studied I have come to two
conclusions which I hope I can apply in my missionary work. If a
person's virtue is based upon what they choose to do when no one is
watching, then a missionary's virtue is based upon what they chose to
think about where ever they may be. Also as I am coming to learn if a
missionary is focused on the work and helping God's children come unto
Christ then they have virtue, with that virtue they have power. Faith
is a principle of power. I hope to always have and utilize that power
as God intends me to do. As I utilize this power the Spirit is brought
into the lives of those I work with everyday, with that Spirit comes
love and improvement and thus a place or area is changed.
I can't believe six weeks have already gone by, oh how quickly time has
flown, I feel like just last week I was sharing how uncomfortable I felt
about white washing again, now here I sit not white washing per say, but
I am staying with Chi Ly we are just heading to a new branch, branch 3
the only Viet branch here where the members love the missionaries, there
are investigators to teach and the branch isn't freaky dysfunctional...this could be fun. I am afraid I will be spoiled to go
back to the standard branches when I get transferred again. It is weird
to think that I haven't even been in Cambodia for six months and already
I will have been to all the branches, considering I only have three
places to go I am wondering how I shall fill the year left I have on my
mission. But I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for me and he has a
plan for the people here, oh how excited I am to see the work unfold
here in Cambodia.
I apologize for not sending emails home full of investigators and
adventures, I guess it is because my mind has been full of other
things. It is hard to be a missionary, to work so hard to help people
and invite them to come unto Christ and have nothing tangible to show
for your success. It is hard to spend sleepless nights pondering what
the Lord would have you do, but feel as if there is a pavilion hiding
you from the Lord. It is hard to not reach certain expectations. I have
been facing these things for some weeks now and now as I contemplate
being transferred I almost wonder what my purpose truly was in coming.
But God's measuring stick is different than ours, his purposes are not
our purposes and the works he needs accomplished are of an eternal
nature. If we ever face uncertainty or feel that we are not reaching
what others expect of us, please remember God has a plan. My biggest
concern has been how must I change to do the Lord's work better here,
what must I become to do the work. Finally one night as I laid side
ways on my bed pondering I realized Heavenly Father sent me here for
many reasons, but one of them was to ultimately be me. Not the natural
man me full of bad habits or selfishness (part of life is learning how
to change and overcome that), but the me that is in touch with my Spirit
and remembers who Heavenly Father created me to be. Sure I'm not a
serious, number oriented missionary, but I love to bring joy to others
and I love testifying of my Savior and perhaps, all along, that is my
purpose for being here. Please if you feel that you have missed the
boat, or aren't what others here on earth expect you to be, ponder on
who you were before you came here and what you should do to become like
that again.
I am so very thankful for the still, small, sweet voice in my life
that brings true peace to our hearts, that brings rest to sleepless
nights and purpose even when things don't make sense. I am thankful for
my knowledge of the Plan of Salvation, that I lived with my Heavenly
Father before I came to this earth and that as we all prove worthy we
can live with him again. In this Christmas season please remember,
Heavenly Father gave us His Beloved Son, because He knew we are all
worth coming home to him again.
All my love and merry Christmas,
Chi
Dao
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