October, wow!

Dear Family,
  If any of what I write today seems to apply to you, it does.  Because I either intended it to or because the Spirit intends it to, do with that what you will. 
  First off though, Happy Birthday Natalie and Mom, I'm glad to hear the pumpkin cheese cake was good and I find myself wondering how well Cheesecake does traveling over an ocean :-).
  This week the Lord has taught me about trust.  First He has spent the last few weeks showing and kindly teaching me that when I feel like something is or should be a certain way, it should be that way.  I am learning that even if I don't really know about something or even if I don't have tangible proof, the Lord through His spirit can still and will confirm truth.  That is why pondering is so important, as we take the time to ponder and open our minds the Lord can show us truth and give us a sublime sense of peace.  I am learning how much I crave that peace.  Heavenly Father is so willing to give us that peace, but we have to put our worries, logic, frettings and freak outs aside before we can receive the peace only the Lord can give.  In a packet of letters Jennifer sent me before I left the MTC, I found a message that continues to speak to me daily.  The Spirit is always there to give comfort and guidance, but we must put all our fears and worries aside in order to allow the Spirit to give us comfort.  This last week I have felt like I needed to receive a blessing.  I didn't know why and I didn't know understand what good I would receive from it.  As I studied each morning and pondered I felt I already knew what the Lord would tell me.  But as I trusted the Lord and asked for that blessing, I did receive a beautiful gift.  No the heavens did not open and no angels appeared, and I can't even say that it was the most eloquent, but it held power.  As I sat in the middle of a circle of Melchezidek Priesthood holders I felt the powers of heaven, I felt protected.  The words that were said, had already been said and I already knew what I must do, but as that humble 19 year old spoke the words from my Heavenly Father I felt their power and I received a clarity of thought I didn't have before.  I realized the reason I felt so confused and overwhelmed is that somewhere in the last week I had tried to take all of Cambodia on shoulders that I knew were weak.  I knew I couldn't speak the language, I knew my body gets tired faster than I would like it too and I knew my temper is shorter than I want it to be.  But in that blessing Heavenly Father reminded me that He is always there, He knows the trials we will go through before we ever see them in the road.  He has promised me, and all of us in fact, the Holy Ghost the third member of the God as our constant, guide and protection, if we will seek for that help.  Somehow I had forgotten to ask for that help.  I was so focused on myself I had forgotten the tools the Lord had given me to succeed.
  Today in personal study as I read an article from July 2011 ( suggest you read it) called something like "Be of Good Cheer" the Lord reminded me how patient he is with all of us.  This life isn't for us to test the patience of God, He already has it.  This life is to help us develop our faith and our patience.  Heavenly Father does already know all that will come to us.  He knows we will struggle to follow his guidance, he knows that sometimes we will fight to have our way, even when we both know his way is the right way, the way to all happiness in this life and in eternity.  He knows if i focus on listening to the Spirit and to my companion when the Spirit speaks through her I will accomplish the work he has sent me here to do.  I testify that Heavenly Father is always patient with us.  He knows that sometimes we are afraid, He knows that sometimes we just feel like we want our way, just little bit.  But I know that when we finally say "here's my heart oh take seal it" Heavenly Father will seal it up to him for our eternal happiness.  Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ we are forgiven of everything and can accomplish anything, if we will ask for the enabling power of Christ.  Please ask for that power, I know I do everyday.  It is the only way I can preach the gospel or teach a lesson in Relief Society in a language I didn't know six months ago.  Perhaps in six months time I will write another email just like this one, and I'll wonder why I'm repeating myself.  But I already know why trusting the Lord is something we have to do everyday and learning to trust Him in every aspect of our lives is a life long process.  I'm thankful for the Lord's patience as we strive to become better.    I love you all so much.  The work moves forward here and what a joy to feel God's love and help in my life as I strive to help his children.  May we all receive renewed strength and joy because as Elder Holland said in "Laborer's of the Vineyard" the thing God loves most about being God is giving mercy to those who don't feel like they deserve it.  I love you and what is more God loves you.  Have a fabulous week :-)

Love Chi Dao

Please know I didn't say what I intended to say, but I learned a lot :-)